Stop Pedestalizing People
When Asking For Help, Appeal To People's Self-Interest, Never To Their Mercy Or Gratitude
One of the most important lessons I’ve learned in life is this: never pedestalize anyone—whether it’s your partner, your boss, or even a family member. When you put people on a pedestal, you start treating them like celebrities, and in return, they treat you like a fan. In doing so, you surrender the power you hold over your own life. The result? You weaken yourself. Before you realize it, they’ve walked away, leaving you in the worst state you’ve ever been.
I’m strongly against idolizing people, especially in relationships. For instance, when a partner tells the other, “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” it comes off as desperate. To me, it reflects a lack of self-love. How can someone else’s presence in your life be the best thing you’ve ever experienced? It shows you haven’t valued or appreciated yourself enough. Of course, this perspective might vary depending on the person and situation, but self-worth should always come from within—not from others.
So, keep your chin up, head high, and surf through the currents of life with confidence. Every day, strive to become the best version of yourself. Never measure your worth by anyone or anything external. People come and go, and so do material things. If your sense of worth is tied to them, you’ll be left in ruins when they’re gone.
On Friendship and Trust
Be mindful of who you call friends. I once spoke to my friend about betrayal. I told him, “When a thief breaks into your home and the dog doesn’t bark, it’s because the dog knows the thief.” His response was profound: “In life, you’ll be betrayed by those you trust most, for he who trusts too much dies betrayed.”
He also warned me, “Beware of friends who clap the loudest for you.” Their applause may not always come from a place of genuine support.
The Bottom Line
Remember you’re on your own. No one is coming to save you. If you have a dream or a goal, start working on it now. Don’t pedestalize people—it only leads to disappointment and ruins. And lastly, trust cautiously.